I have a vivid memory of the first time I felt thrilled that I had a means to communicate effectively. Actually, the event took place just after I made the final period at the end of the first story I ever wrote. I was sitting in an old brown wooden chair behind my little desk in our Old Greenwich, Connecticut school. Our first-grade teacher, Mrs. McGrath, assigned us to write a story. We were kids who had barely learned enough words to create one, but I was so excited that my pencil seemed to race over the page by itself.

The next day, Mrs. McGrath handed back the stories with corrections, walked back to her desk in front of the blackboard, and said, “I would like to have Steve to come up and read his story.” I was a reticent little kid vibrating with nervous energy and excitement as I read Jack and the Beanstalk in Sandgate, Vermont. I had adapted the English fairy tale so that it took place on the Green Mountain behind our vacation house in Vermont. It was all of about six sentences long, but my self-esteem rose to the height of the beanstalk when I finished and saw the smile on Mrs. McGrath’s face.

We had some brilliant kids in that well-to-do little town, and I couldn’t compete with the best of them in math and science. However, in Mr. Sisson’s class in third grade, I beat them all in a short story contest. What a thrill that was that this tall, ever-businesslike teacher thought highly of me as a writer!

Writing Equaled Self-Esteem

Throughout my school years, I found it difficult to get across my thoughts in speech to others while socializing in a group of two or more children. I could not process other kid’s statements fast enough to speak nor could I spit out the words rapidly or boldly enough to lead conversations. Sometimes I felt “less than” as I tried to fit in, but partially made up for it with a quick wit.  

My abilities in English class and writing provided much self-esteem in high school. In college and in graduate journalism school, professors would take me aside and tell me I had a  gift I should use. Again, being able to communicate on paper gave this reticent young man a sense of empowerment. I had things to say and people found them interesting. It went a long way towards making up for not being able to get the right words out face-to-face. But I still longed to speak better face to face.

I  began writing articles for pay for the Bennington Banner newspaper in college, and was thrilled every morning I left one on the editor’s desk. During graduate school, I felt honored to participate in the American Society of Magazine Editor’s Internship program in New York, and went back to work as an editor at McGraw-Hill Publications after graduation. I was now getting paid for my writing and my stories about top American executives reached people across the country. I still didn’t communicate orally so well, so I carefully wrote out my interview questions so I could read them if need be. Again, I was thrilled with good feedback on my articles.

From Paper to Mouth!

After I started my own house-painting business and then one in home improvement, I began to see clearly that my writing skills writing could be transferred to oral communication. I knew I’d have trouble spitting out  the right words to customers who disagreed with me on some aspect of the work we had contracted to do, so I wrote out and memorized the sentences I would speak. Several times, people made lame excuses for not paying me, and I was able to explain accurately and concisely in words why I was correct. I continued to use carefully crafted letters to back myself up when needed. I got my money every time. What a feeling of empowerment! Communicating well both in spoken words and in writing is a powerful combination, and has proven valuable in my personal life too.

As I work on social media marketing for my second book, Call Me Norman, The Backstories of Rockwell’s Beloved Models, I now find that I am almost as effective in face-to-face communication as in writing. Both require being prepared and alert, stating thoughts concisely, and keeping on point. Just as a means to effective oral communication is reason enough to spend time working at the craft of writing.